Women and the Internet

Today I was on Facebook and I was reminded of one the great truths of the modern miracle we call the internet. But it wasn’t about how much valuable information could be shared across the world or how many new avenues for business could be opened up via the web, but rather an ongoing observation that at times has me shaking my head in disbelief.

If you are a woman and put a picture or video of yourself in public, eventually some guy will come along and hit on you.

If you post it they will come.

It hit me as I was reading a thread created by a writer I subscribed to who also just happens to be female. The writer had posted some new pictures of herself and along with the usual kind remarks and friendly banter were the male sharks, smelling blood and posting comments that are thinly veiled attempts to make a love connection via social media.

Being inquisitive I went through the profile pics of other female public figures I subscribe too and found more of the same, including some that would have been out of place in the comments section of a pornographic video.

“No, I do not want to see pics of your appendex scar!”

Now, it’s not that I am blind and do not find any of these girls attractive, of course I do, but even if I was single I’d think better of trying to flirt with a person in a public forum when they just happen to post up some new personal photos.

A commenter on one profile pic even mentioned that someone had shared the pic and posted it on his Facebook wall, something that unless you personally know the individual and are sharing the picture with mutual friends is creepy in itself.

A long time ago I was bored (Don’t be afraid, it’s not what you think) and joined a Yahoo! chat room, not a sex orientated one either but just a general forum for people to chat in. Besides being amazed by the ratio of ‘bots’ to Humans, I was also surprised at how many males were in the room waiting for a real honest to goodness female to type something.

When some poor unsuspecting woman did finally post something it was like watching a group of tigers fighting over a fresh zebra as they all appeared out of no where, with comments and suggestions running the gauntlet from repeated calls of ‘hello’ to some that were just downright sick.

Now I know that the web is just an extension of our own habits in everyday life, but with the major difference of anonymity. People who would never dare to say “you’re hot” to a girl at the local watering hole or at work will gladly post it over and over on the net, usually with results that make you seem silly and at times more then a bit desperate.

I do believe that it is possible to fall in love or find someone you really relate to over the internet, but I think that steady conversation and getting to know that person and just being their friend is a more effective method then posting “Nice legs” on a profile pic on Facebook or Google +, as old fashioned as that may sound.

4 Responses to Women and the Internet

  1. Anjasa says:

    You know, I was thinking about this not too long ago, because I’m a woman, and I’m on the internet, and I never really get harassed. I mean, if I post pictures, my friends might say something stupid like “I’d hit it”, but these people have been my friends for years and I know and am comfortable with their personality and stuff, so I don’t consider it harassing or insulting at all.

    I play games, make no bones about being a woman – a woman who writes erotica, no less – and I’m fairly open about it all, and I don’t think I’ve ever really felt harassed about my gender.

    Sure I’ve gotten some people who were a little overly flirty, but they were quickly taken care of.

    Maybe it’s because I don’t post my picture freely, or publicly, and I don’t do voice chats, but I’ve just never really felt like as a woman I was a ‘rare catch’ online.

    • tomspy77 says:


      First of all, thanks for stopping by and reading!

      I am glad to know there are women out there who take it all in stride and ignore the idiots who try to be a little too overbearing and bothersome.

      I will say that half of that post was really just me musing on why a man would think that posting lewd comments is cute or even worse, a good tactic for meeting women.

      Thanks for commenting and glad to have you here!

      • Anjasa says:

        Oh there are a lot of women who just had to deal with it after getting constant harassement – a lot of feminist sites get a lot of hate, and fat acceptance blogs have to have really strict commenting rules because of how mean people are.

        And yea, I think there’s definitely a disconnect with how people approach women online. Part of it, I’m sure, is just feeling more comfortable online, and the other part is that the internet attracts a lot of people that aren’t good on a face to face basis, so they don’t have strong social skills.

        Sometimes I get some really over the top comments on one site I go to that’s centred around erotica, but most of them are harmless. They’re just really into my writing or art or whatever and go overboard on the compliments. I don’t mind though😉

  2. […] Women and the Internet (thomaswillamspychalski.wordpress.com) […]

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