Restless And Wanting

I was wearing all my outdoor clothes inside,
Because I just wanted to leave,
Had no way and no where to go,
Wanted the feelings of my love.

Laws don’t mean the heart don’t hurt,
Gatherings that burnt my soul down,
Old fashioned but that’s why I shine,
That’s why you believe me like no other.

So I waited in the cold, it fit my chest’ s misery,
Waiting for someone so far away from me,
That came in and moved me, made me alive,
I miss that even though I get the why.

Don’t get the disregard when I called to you when I needed,
How about the disregard of what was truly real,
Gods and plans and simple wind blown fancies.
Things that do not change my inside cutting.

I’m outside everyone’s silent, I get lonely too,
Nothing to be by my side in real time virtual reality only,
I need that completed circle to be encoded in me from past times,
Here I am, right here always willing, but the burn breaks my skin.

There I was wearing all my outside clothes indoors or right outside,
Duel chairs mocking me with their emptiness,
It was not so long ago you were in that cheap throne that shines more than diamonds,
And here I am, waiting with no where to go, no one here and I’m lonely too…

But I burn from the fires stoked high,
Someone else was within and with you,
It scars so much, I’m never enough for anyone,
That is why hurts as I sit here dressed up nowhere to be, no one to see I’m lonely too.
-Thomas Spychalski

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