Top Ten Things on Melania Trump’s Birthday List:

April 26, 2019

If you want another top ten based on Donny, click here.

10: Any birthday ‘dinner’not on the McDonald’s value menu.

9: Asylum.

8: For any other man to jump out of her birthday cake.

7: Another ‘Russian Probe’ rather than shrunken American sausage.

6: Access to Michelle Obama’s ‘speech vault.’

5: A cure for Stockholm Syndrome.

4: Armor against those monthly ‘stomach rashes’ from sex.

3: Ruby Slippers.

2: Divorce.

And the number one thing Melania wanted for her birthday was:

“A stable penis.”

-Thomas Spychalski

Wise Thought of the Day #12

January 12, 2018

“The best tool a creative writer can have is his five-year-old self in his head, the kid that imagined they were in space floating in zero gravity when jumping on the bed and had tea parties with his or her best imaginary friends.” – Thomas Spychalski 

Wise Thought of the Day # 11

January 11, 2018

“If one feels privileged to stand in the light of the master, one should realize he is a student on his way to BECOMING a master.” –Thomas Spychalski

Wise Thought of the Day # 10

December 3, 2017

Just as applicable to writing as to life…

“But don’t damn me when I speak
A piece of  mind
‘Cause silence isn’t golden
When I’m holding it inside
‘Cause I’ve been where I have been
And I’ve seen what I have seen
I put the pen to the paper
‘Cause it’s all a part of me.”

-Guns ‘N Roses: Don’t Damn Me

‘Spider Bites’ Fan Art

November 19, 2017

A reader and someone I chat with produced some artwork a while back for the short story Spider Bites and wanted me to share it with all of you, so here it is:

If you have not read the short story Spider Bites yet, please click here and don’t forget to tell me what you think.


The Small Things Drag You Down

March 19, 2017

“It’s the little things that kill
Tearing at my brains again
The little things that kill…” – Bush

Depression and mental illness are still taboo words in the modern world, at least in the sense that although as a species we are more aware that these things actually do exist (I mean come on, as recently as the fifties or sixties you could tell your family doctor you were feeling ‘down’ and he or she would hand you a script for quaaludes…which just created another problem) and the ways that they work, but I think when it comes down to society we still do not see depression as the same as we would someone in a wheelchair or with a broken leg.

Most of us would open a door for the two examples of physical ailments described above but most are hard pressed to do the same thing for someone who is suffering from depression or anxiety, two mental illnesses that have dominated large across my nearly four decades on this Earth.

So in that sense, I am being a bit unfair and hypocritical, because of it easier for me to empathize and relate to others I might encounter who are suffering through similar times and the same disease.

And then my whirlwind of a smart but totally fucked at times mind (that is a technical term by the way, and I think I just stole a joke from a Batman film), will go even further down the rabbit hole and tell me psychology is still a kind of new science being taught to people that think a reality television star would make a good world leader and at one time thought disco was cool.

(Yeah, my brain is kind of a dick.)

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Self Composite Sketch

December 6, 2016

They took the eyes of a clear-headed man, he would see no bias and could also see with clarity how foolish every society around him was because they refused the greatest gift, the gift of themselves, which would later be a great source of irony.

Heart of tarnished gold, made that way by the smoke burnt down below, in some ways a treasure in the world as it is now and in others an overcompensating parody of what the heart does, dipping into contracted tyranny.

Mind ‘scattered’ with gifts to be sure, but this one had been rocked, this one had been rolled, words and notes can flow like a fastly moving stream, complex thoughts lead to a wondrous and misunderstood place where the greatest of man has arisen before, but yet the pain that has throbbed forever has never fully abated.

In the mind, there are gifts but also unwanted property, a million insults programmed in the pathways of daily creation, deadly mantras that in horror feel like breath, for even as the memories remain and time works its fading magic, the truest truth remains, it was never the world, but the mirror he truly hated.

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